JAZZ SINGER'S SECRET LIFE: AN EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

Subject: CNI News -- Vol. 4, No. 9, Part 2 -- July 1, 1998 Date: Mon, 13 Jul 1998 19:59:46 EDT From: CNINews1@aol.com

[Pamela Stonebrooke is a successful professional singer living in Los Angeles, California. As reported in the June 16 edition of CNI News, Ms. Stonebrooke is also a self-professed contactee whose forthcoming book, "Experiencer: A Jazz Singer's True Account of Extraterrestrial Contact," (to be published by Ballantine) tells of her unusual encounters with an entity she calls a reptilian. CNI News editor Michael Lindemann interviewed Ms. Stonebrooke by phone on June 21, 1998.]

Michael Lindemann: Pamela, let's start with some background. I know you're a singer, but I've heard you also have a "day job." What's that?

Pamela Stonebrooke: I've done a lot of celebrity personal assisting. Currently, for the past seven months, I've been working for a company that's working in conjunction with Paramount Pictures on building the Starship Enterprise as a full-scale touring exhibit.

ML: That sounds like a fun job.

PS: Well, it's administrative assisting -- paper pushing for me, but it was quite an endeavor. We were very ambitious to do this.

ML: What exactly was your part in this project?

PS: I assist the two producers. One was traveling extensively, and I was in charge of getting information from the contractors and investors and filtering it to my boss, who was in Rio quite a bit, and Italy and England, setting up where the exhibit is going to tour. I work with the other producer on the studio lot at Paramount as his right-hand person.

ML: OK. Now let's talk about your singing career. How long have you been a professional singer?

PS: I put my first band together when I was 14 years old, to my mother's
dismay.

ML: Did you play an instrument?

PS: I played piano, but basically I liked to front my own band.

ML: So you've always been the singer?

PS: Yes, I've always been. I have a midi studio at home where I do all my own writing, music and lyrics. I program all my own instruments. Musicians will know what I'm talking about.

ML: So you write your own songs?

PS: Yes, I do. I have a cassette of my original music available on my own label. It's called "Experiencer" and features two contact-inspired songs.

ML: Do you perform only your own material?

PS: No, not only. I've done jazz clubs forever. I love jazz. I played in Japan for eight years and in New York, and I've traveled as a backup singer for some really major bands. We've played venues in Europe for 70,000 people.

ML: Give me one example of a major band....

PS: Hoyt Axton. We were on tour over there with the Country Western Festival with Tammy Wynette, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis... It was pretty amazing. I had a solo number on that tour.

ML: Country Western isn't really your style, is it?

PS: No, it's not my style. But I did it because I wanted to go to Europe, Germany in particular. I also had an independent record deal in the UK. I just finished signing the contract for a distribution deal with a record label in Germany. I've had singles out in Germany and England, and about a year ago I put out a CD called Agartha, with two friends of mine and another female vocalist, which is climbing the New Age charts right now.

ML: And you're also singing in clubs around the Los Angeles area, right?

PS: Yes, with my trio... I always call them my jazz trio, but I actually have revolving members, because jazz is like a language. I've been doing private parties around town for about 15 years, so I know all the best players. I know about ten guys that can cover every instrument and that know my repertoire.

ML: I understand you play some pretty well-known venues in L.A., such as the Catalina club, not just small time places that no one's ever heard of.

PS: I've done that too, but I actually have somewhat of a name here in L.A. as a jazz singer. Agents know me, and I get called for some of the best jobs.

ML: That's the point. Like many people who have unusual experiences of the kind we're about to discuss, you're a person who has made a name for yourself through your talents. You've held good jobs. You've got good credentials. I think I can reasonably assume you're not seeking fame or notoriety through your encounters....

PS: To even come forward with this has really put me in a tenuous spot on many levels. I'm actually reluctant to even be famous. I've walked away from many record deals because I wasn't happy with the people around me and I didn't want to be there. I have such a deep reverence for my artistry and my life, in terms of it being peaceful... I now wonder if I've shattered that possibility....

ML: So here you were, a successful person in a good life -- and then unusual things started to happen. How was it, and when was it, that you realized you also have what Dr. David Jacobs calls "a secret life"?

PS: I generally try to preface this with the fact that I've been digging into the paranormal for quite some time. I astral projected about thirteen or fourteen years ago. I had an out of the body experience.

ML: Was that spontaneous?

PS: Yes, I had no idea what was happening.

ML: You weren't trying to do it?

PS: No. But it was such an incredible experience that I was, first of all, freaked out, very afraid. But I wanted to find out what it was and see if I could do it again. So I really set out to become a skilled astral projector.

ML: How did you do that? Did you go to the Monroe Institute for training?

PS: No, I would have loved to, but I just read every book I could find. The one that I recommend to people is Rick Stack's book, "Out of the Body Experiences," because he takes all the voodoo out of it, anything that's scary... So, I really got into astral projection. I went to other planets. But I thought it was all in my imagination. I even went to places that scared the living daylights out of me, but I was fine when I came back, because I knew that I was out of my body. So I was really having a ball. It was one of the discoveries in my life that expanded my awareness so incredibly. I had been on a metaphysical path anyway, so it was solidifying some of those concepts for me.

ML: Do you continue to do this today?

PS: I do indeed.

ML: So this is something that has become a part of your life.

PS: Absolutely. It's one of my greatest adventures.

ML: OK. You said this is sort of a preamble....

PS: Mainly because when I had this [alien encounter] experience, it had the flavor of an out of the body experience. The reason I believe it had that flavor is that I believe these experiences are taking place in both the astral and the 3-D physical dimension that we're in. I think they slip in and out, and we slip in and out. The difference for me, and the thing that freaked me out about my first encounter, was that I awoke aboard what I think is a spacecraft -- I was in a metallic room, oddly shaped...

ML: When was this?

PS: This was five years ago.

ML: Was this again an unexpected, spontaneous event?

PS: Yes, it was.

ML: Were you at home at the time?

PS: I was at home before I awoke aboard this craft. It was out of a sleep state.

ML: Had you gone to bed?

PS: Yes. I'm not going to go into too much detail, because it's all in the book. But basically, I [awoke] in a room, and the traditional gray beings -- which I had really not that much idea about, because I had never been to a conference or anything before this -- entered the room.

ML: Do you mean to say you had not read or heard about the so-called grays prior to this?

PS: I had not paid much attention to this whole thing. I was into metaphysics and channeling and opening my chakras. I had never read any accounts, never been to a UFO conference. I wasn't really interested in that stuff. I remember not being judgmental about it, and thinking, well, there has to be other life, but what's next in my life and where's the party? I just never thought about it.

ML: OK. So these beings came in. Then what happened?

PS: They were filing into the room and standing around me. And this being that I perceived as a female came over to me. I was literally shaking in a corner. I was in a fetal position, going "No, no, where am I? What is going on?" I was panicked. This being came over and put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Don't be afraid. All you have to do is be here. Come with me." She took me into a room. It's still very vivid to me. On this metallic table that was a couple of feet from the floor were these four little girls, ages about 8, 9, 10, 11 -- something like that -- and they came running over to me, calling me mommy. I was literally paralyzed against the wall. And they were grabbing the bottom of my arms, because I was trying to pull my arms away. They were grabbing me, and I couldn't pull away. I was panicked because, first of all, I had never wanted to be a mother. I had always made sure that I had never been pregnant, although putting pieces together now, I remember years ago having four false pregnancies which I couldn't explain at the time, and I didn't worry about, because I hadn't been with anyone.

ML: You're saying that you can recall, in the 3-D part of your life years ago, having four false pregnancies?

PS: Yes. At the time, I was really busy, as I always am, because I always try to do more than any human could possibly do, but I was also partying a lot and living the lifestyle of a musician. So I had excuses for why I was hemorrhaging, or why I had weird symptoms or morning sickness. I had other reasons. I was heavily into the music scene, so I made excuses for all that stuff and really didn't worry about it, because I didn't know they were false pregnancies at the time. Like I say, I'm just piecing this stuff together. I don't know what it all means. I'm not sure I'll ever know. But I'm trying to pay attention now, trying to make some sense out of things that have occurred in my life that I couldn't explain way back.

ML: OK. Let's go back to your experience on the ship. You said this gray being talked to you, but what do you mean by that?

PS: Telepathically. It was a thought-transference kind of thing.

ML: OK. Did the four little girls look like normal human children?

PS: They didn't look human, but human-like. They really looked like a mixture. I was afraid of them because, first of all, I couldn't imagine me being a mother, and secondly, I couldn't imagine being the mother of something I didn't fully recognize as human. In retrospect, I've dealt with the guilt I felt for not being able to embrace them and accept them.

ML: When you woke up the next morning, was all of this clear in your memory?

PS: Yes, vivid. And I knew that something about it was different than an astral projection. Because, literally, I have astral projected to places where there were half-animal, half-human beings tearing at me, and have awakened in the morning and said, "Oh man, I'm glad that was only a projection." So now we have little girls grabbing my arm, and I'm totally panic-stricken. It doesn't make sense.

ML: Was there anything else you can tell us about that on-board experience before you woke up the next morning?

PS: Yes, lots of little details. But they're all in the book, and they're not really that important here. What's really important is why I was convinced that this was different. I was pacing all day. I had my kimono on. And I noticed that my arms were sore at the bottom. So I pulled my kimono sleeve up, and I saw little bruise marks on my arm, from my elbow down to my wrist. They were little dime-like bruise marks. The minute I saw them, it was sort of a confirmation to me that something really insane had happened, something physical. So the next year and a half I was pretty much a mess. I was trying to share with friends, my minister at Science of Mind; and I was really unhappy at not being taken seriously, in fact looked at like I was crazy. My friends stopped calling me because I wasn't fun any more. All I wanted to talk about was this...

ML: Did you become a bit obsessive?

PS: Yes. Obsessive, and very serious and very disturbed. Actually, I think
some of my friends who know that I am not one to fabricate, were afraid that it was real. They didn't really want to hear it at all. So I started reading, and I went to a channeler that I'd been out of touch with for many years. He was the guy [Darryl Anka] -- little known to me at the time -- who had just done the artwork for Kim Carlsberg's book, "Beyond My Wildest Dreams." The night of the channeling, I asked Bashar [the channeled entity] about my experience, and that I had seen my four hybrid daughters, and he just flippantly said, "Yes. And...?" And I went, "What do you mean, yes AND!? If this is really happening, I'm freaked out." He said, "Well, you don't have to be. There are ways to deal with this, and you signed up for this." After the session, I told Darryl when he came out of trance what I had asked Bashar, and he said, "I have something for you." He took me outside to his car and gave me Kim Carlsberg's book. I think I must have sobbed all the way through it. It's pretty amazing to get confirmation, although it's rarely consolation in these instances. It was somehow healing in its own way. It helped me start processing stuff. I still have a real hard time talking about some of the medical procedures that I remember from incidents after that. In fact, that's the only thing that I can't really talk about without having the trauma come back in my face. It's funny. I have no trouble talking about the reptilians, because the connection was emotional and what I felt to be very spiritual. There was no trauma involved, believe it or not, compared to some of the medical procedures.

ML: Your mention of medical procedures suggests to me that you've recalled other encounters with the grays. Is that correct?

PS: Yes, I started to remember other encounters, and they were very disturbing to me.

ML: Do you mean encounters that happened prior to this conscious one with the grays?

PS: No, after. See, I started to become aware of them, so I was on my guard, and I got snippets that were extremely frightening to me. Most of the stuff that scared me was the medical stuff, because of the coldness and the detachment that I felt from the beings, not to mention the physical symptoms.

ML: You say there's a big difference between the encounters that involve these medical procedures and encounters with beings you term "reptilian." In an "Open Letter" you recently posted to the internet, you noted that so-called reptilians are "not politically correct aliens," and a lot of people are especially disturbed by the idea of reptilians. But you've said -- and you said it again on the Art Bell radio show recently -- that you actually enjoyed your sexual encounter with a reptilian being. Can you explain this?

PS: I didn't make myself clear on the Art Bell show, because I couldn't really express the way I felt in terms of a mental connection with this being. For women, I believe, this is really essential to intimacy. I said that the connection we had, and the sex, was better than anything I had experienced. But it wasn't so much the physical act of sex as the whole experience of ecstatic mental, spiritual, emotional and physical -- a combination of experience -- that made it so amazing to me.

ML: When did you first have an encounter with a being you call a reptilian? How did that come about?

PS: I was really getting through my gray stuff pretty well. I had managed to finally apply my metaphysics, one of the fundamentals of [which] is that our spirit -- the part of us that is a spark of the infinite -- signs us up for some lessons to be learned in this life. We basically pick our script, make our contract, come here, do it the best we can, and if we're lucky, wake up to the fact that we can actually author this experience with our thoughts, beliefs, minds, awareness. So I finally was able to apply my metaphysics and say, if I signed up for everything else in my life, then I definitely signed up for this too. Now, what can these experiences, like any other experiences, teach me about myself? How can they expand the way I see myself, who I am, what I'm doing here? What is it doing for me? What can it do for me? Well, the first and most obvious thing is that it can make me face any fear. If I can get through the fear of something that I don't even have the vocabulary or science to explain, then there won't be much in this physical dimension that frightens me. So I said, if I signed up for this, I must be ready for it. Nothing presents itself to me unless I am equal to that opportunity. So again, I just filtered my metaphysics into it and really made peace with it. Then I said, OK, I want to know more. What's really going on here? And in my meditations, I said, Take me further. Let me know what's happening here. I want to see every aspect of myself. Because I finally realized that these entities that I'm meeting, just like the people we meet in our everyday lives, are aspects of myself. This is where my searching has taken me. So, basically, the reptilian showed up. The first time, it shape-shifted from a gorgeous blond man to a reptilian being...

ML: When was this?

PS: That was about a year and a half after my gray stuff, when I really started to process it and feel comfortable. I was ready for anything.

ML: Was that about three and a half years ago?

PS: Yes, about that.

ML: When you woke up, where did you see this blond man?

PS: I woke up in my bed and he was making love to me. I was pretty sure that I was totally awake, that it wasn't a dream. I always check myself, because I'm also a lucid dreamer. And I said to myself, I don't know this person. I didn't bring him home last night. But I also felt like there was a mental connection. It didn't feel like a lucid dream, it didn't feel like out of the body. I didn't know what it was, but I felt pretty safe. I mean, I'm pretty bold these days. I'm not dead yet -- I haven't died from all this stuff. Especially with the telepathic communication and the messages I was getting. "You're safe with me. We have been together before." That kind of stuff.

ML: Then what happened?

PS: Basically, the entity shape-shifted into a reptilian being.

ML: When you say reptilian being, why do you say that? What features make this being reptilian to you?

PS: That's [how] I've come to identify it. It's humanoid, very sentient. I could tell there was an incredible intelligence and mental communication with this being. I felt in a lot of ways that I was looking at a part of myself once again, an aspect of myself, something very familiar to me. It did have almost like a snake's body -- if you rub it the way the scales flow -- firm but smooth. That's what it felt like to me.

ML: What kind of eyes did it have?

PS: The eyes were a bit larger than ours, and I was catching glimpses of colors: gold, speckles of red, and brown, with a vertical pupil.

ML: Vertical like a cat's eye?

PS: Yes. And very handsome, oddly enough. Maybe because, again, of the mental communication. I was shocked and frightened because of the appearance at first, and then I decided to participate.

ML: Are you saying that your lovemaking was continuing as this being became a reptile?

PS: That's correct.

ML: Did the being give you any indication why it revealed itself when it had been looking perfectly blond and normal to you?

PS: No. And in the other subsequent encounters I've had, there's been no
shapeshifting involved. He just appears.

ML: He appears as a reptile?

PS: Yes.

ML: Is it clear to you that it's the same one?

PS: My feeling is that it is, yes.

ML: Have you seen more than one?

PS: No, I haven't.

ML: Apart from your physical contact, apparently you have some sort of communication with this being. What's the nature of that communication, generally? Is he revealing secrets of the universe? Telling you he loves you? What does he say to you?

PS: Yes, love is expressed, but basically what I get, and part of this is from [hypnotic] regression, is an apocalyptic type scenario that I would have to prepare for.

ML: You're being shown an apocalyptic future?

PS: Possibly. That's the way I'm interpreting it. There may be something that I will see in my lifetime that I will have to deal with, and I'm being reminded of the amount of spiritual/emotional centeredness and oneness that I have to come to as a being to make whatever transition is necessary. This is just my interpretation. Everything I say should be prefaced with, "It seems to me," because I have no answers to any of this stuff yet, and I may not, ever. I know I'm going to be looking for them, digging for them. But I may have to make a friend of the unknown forever, in terms of unraveling this. I want to make peace with this, because I don't want to live a life of desperation. I want it to be like Christmas presents that you unwrap one by one.

ML: Do you see a relationship between the various entities you've met -- grays and reptilians, for example -- or are these different types of entities
operating separately?

PS: For me, they are somewhat separate. I think we're talking about many different factions within many different species, coming from the past, present and future as we know time to exist. So I think that there could be intelligent, benevolent, incredibly spiritually evolved reptilians. I think there could be warrior classes that are still raping and pillaging, like any invading force might do in a foreign land. One thing I want to stress is that it's really dangerous to blanket-statement any of these entities. I've come to realize [that] the more peace I make with these experiences, the more peaceful they are.

ML: You seem remarkably at ease, considering what you've been through. Is there any final thought you'd like to share with our readers?

PS: One of the most amazing things about this is that it really makes you look at your belief system. I think that unless we all do that, we don't stand a chance of having the kind of life we're all entitled to have -- one that's peaceful, that has a sense of unity and oneness. I don't think the truth is ever going to be delivered in the package that we want it in. The truth is not a drive-through fast food restaurant -- it's something you really have to find the ingredients for, and make your own salad, you know? I think people are opening up to this. I think they feel on an intuitive level that there's something greater going on here. I don't see people rolling their eyes any more when I talk about this stuff. That's a really positive thing.

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* * CONTINUED in Vol. 4, No. 9, Part 3 * *
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